samedi, juin 03, 2006

Oh Mother!

Any of you moms out there in blog-land ever feel like this time of life is about SURVIVNG?

I joked with Jeremy last night that we could have a 24/7 live web-cam in our home, post our lives on the internet (totally exploiting ourselves and our children), and probably become famous millionairs by the end of the week. We would call it "Survivor Household- the Daily Challenge!" I'm sure we'd have many, many viewers -- mainly stay-at-home mothers-- due to the reality of our hectic and survivor-mode lives! We barely drag ourselves out of our tangled sheets in the far-too-early AM, to the cry of need from the crib down the hallway. We attempt a hot slice of toast and a cup of tea, but enjoy neither once we actually have the chance to sit down and put our lips to the cold, dry substances. For sake of time (see, there's forever a lack of such a thing when one is in the throes of mothering) I'll skip the obvious chaos and adrenaline-performed drama of the rest of the day, and remind you of the typical evening of putting kids down to bed- three, maybe four, times before they actually stay there- and then, if lucky, we may curl up on the couch with a book or a movie for a brief moment before zone-ing out, or zonking right out. There's no energy to give much of yourself to your husband (and if there is at all, it is more "duty" than "pleasure"). There is definately little vigor to attempt chewing on a piece of Scripture-- if only we could be nourished through a Bible Interveinis (I.V). Add to the busy-ness the emotional stuff of life, the financial stresses, the irritating facts of living in shoulder-rubbing quarters with several others, and the nature of our flesh to be grumpy.... We can relate to each other, no?

Obviously posting our family as an entertainment option is a fecicious thought- I would never want to live in such a glass house (besides the fact that it would shatter around us with the first smack of Ben's head into the wall). But, as entertaining as it could be to the outside viewer, I believe such reality is not necessary!! (even though I cannot claim that I've

"If being a mother is the hardest job on earth, and if we are the most overcommitted people on the planet, then it's no wonder that caring for everyone else superseded almost every attempt to nurture our souls and to pursue spiritual maturity. We don't have eyes to see from the lack of want, because deep in the heat of every woman is a longing for the fullness that only Christ can offer. We don't have eyes to see becaue we have committed all our energies, all of our love, all of our devotion, and all of our vision to everyone except Jesus. And in doing so, it has seemed noble, righteous, servantlike, humble, and almost saintly to give to the brink of exhaustion. My mentor says, 'Good can be the enemy of the best.' In trying to be good mothers, have we forsaken what is best?"
- Angela Thomas Guffy in Tender Mercy for a Mother's Soul

I was encouraged this morning, again, by reading Psalm 34- over and over and over. I truly LOVE meditating on one Psalm for some time- generally over a period of a week- especially when it is obviously "planted" at the precise season in my life that I need to hear it!
(Try this Psalm for yourself, but we cannot assume that it will feed you in the same way that it has nourished me.) In a time of fatigue and extreme giving of oneself, I wouldn't recommend attempting a major exigetical study of a profound nature. Let the yoke of Christ offer you rest and peace. Meditate on the obvious encouragements- such as some of the Psalms- rather than digging into the "deeper" stuff, which may seem a more mature kind of studying. But God's put us in a place of relating with children; realize that the most necessary principles and truths we need to meditate on are simple enough (and honestly, most profound of all) for a child to read (and if you're like me in this season, you're all "baby-brained!") .

I'm bringing this note to an abrupt close, mainly because I cannot afford another moment with my back turned to my toddlers, facing this impersonal box of bright screen and popping letters. My only hope in "wasting" the time that I already have this morning at the computer, is that somehow it might encourage someone reading it. I know that just pounding out these thoughts of my reality has encouraged me.

Tanya
Posted by Jeremy J Harnett :: 7:07 a.m. :: 3 comments

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